LADIES SHOULD ALSO HAVE A CHANCE

LADIES SHOULD ALSO HAVE A CHOICE

Are we held captive by our culture to the extent that we cannot think for ourselves? Some socially constructed roles should be treated with an open mind and not followed as if they are part of the Ten Commandments.

I was listening to a local F.M station and the hosts were talking about who is supposed to make the first move between a man and a woman. Responses from callers were shocking to me. Many were of the opinion that it is the man who should initiate such moves and not the woman. And that it is very imprudent of a lady to approach a man in the name of starting a relationship.

I thought hard about this and could not understand why it should be the man and not woman to do so. Are we so closed and rigid in our minds that we cannot allow civilization to weed out some redundant cultural norms?

In biology we are told that all human beings possess the same emotions and feelings to mate or be in a relationship. Where has it been told that the feelings of a man should override that of a woman? There is no place for such assertions and so we should be free to let one exercise what he or she feels to be right. If you like somebody do not hold yourself, go ahead and express your feelings lest someone take him away from you.

Can this rigidity be the reason why infidelity is so rampant in our society today? When a woman is not given the chance to choose the person she thinks her heart beats for, it can lead to many complications. Some women have a man they would really love to spend their lives with but due to cultural dictates, they are afraid to approach them. They fear being seen as prostitutes as our society thinks that it is only prostitutes who approach men.  This makes some women to agree to advances from men they would not live with for a lifetime due to pressure of age catching up with them or because their mates have been married.

Imagine if a woman married a man she wanted with all her mind and heart. It would make her content with him and not go out to look for what she is missing and would have wanted to have. I think this would reduce cases of a woman having more than one partner at the same time.

This situation according to me is also a cause of many single women in the society. Men fear women who have made it in the society and at the same time these women also fear approaching men as the society discourages this. This leads to many successful women remaining single for the rest of their lives.

I think this should be the time for us to be open-minded and allow our ladies also have the chance to choose what they relish. Let the man also have the chance to vet a woman who approaches him if they mean good or not, whether they are in it for money or for love.